THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
What Nobody Tells You About Imposter Syndrome and What to do About It
Have you ever felt like a fraud - like you were going to get found out for not being good enough?
An estimated 70% of the population feels like an imposter at some point in their lives. So if you are experiencing it, you’re not alone. But misery does NOT always love company, and especially in this case, knowing the real truth behind what imposter syndrome actually is, will leave you with a sense of freedom and confidence that will make you wonder why no one told you this before.
In case you’re the 30% of the population that has never heard this term, let’s define it. Imposter syndrome is when someone feels like a fraud and unworthy of their successes. It’s often described as a feeling of fear of being “found out” by your colleagues and peers.
The reason why so many people feel it is that as humans, our brains are programmed from a very young age to have doubts. When we are children, mostly between the ages of 0 to 7, we develop our perception of the world.
We are told by our parents and teachers that we need to follow rules, that we need to be quiet, and oftentimes, we are criticized by well-meaning caretakers and told to perform better. This causes our impressionable brains to criticize ourselves because of it, and patterns form inside of our own heads.
These patterns begin a lifetime of unconscious negative and critical self talk.
Additionally, 80% of all human thought is negative and 95% of it is unconscious. This develops a patterned way of thinking that often holds us back throughout our entire lives.
Then one day you land in a job or opportunity for work that really means a lot to you. You are excited about it and at times, may feel completely confident and excited. Until imposter syndrome hits.
Suddenly you’re doubting why you got that opportunity. You start to focus on your inability to do the job. You see others being better. And fear creeps in of being afraid of being called out.
But what no one tells you about imposter syndrome is that the word imposter is a lie.
You think you know very little, you think you’re small, and you feel like the image you’re presenting is so much bigger than who you really are.
But that is an assumption and the truth is, what you know and what you think others think of you is probably EQUAL. What causes imposter syndrome and the truth about it is, instead of owning your abilities, you’re looking for a reflection of your self worth, rather than your capabilities, which is how others judge you.
This is a reflection of your self worth vs. your capabilities.
While most people tell you that imposter syndrome is about you not feeling good enough, the truth is, you are looking for VALIDATION because you have an unconscious loop running and re-running a limiting story you tell yourself yourself.
For whatever is hidden in the subconscious part of your mind about your own self worth - which is usually a sub-par version of yourself - causes doubt, fear of being found out, and a drop of confidence.
That means that the praise or recognition you receive from your boss or teammates gives you a temporary boost of feeling confident and qualified, but it quickly goes away. Seeking approval from others and not separating yourself self worth from you actual capabilities makes you more likely to fall into imposter syndrome and in the process, lose your confidence and personal value.
It’s our own internal defenses that tell the lie of not being good enough to protect ourselves from criticism. Hiding or diminishing our flaws and fears to ourselves instead of owning them and letting ourselves learn as we always have done, becomes the story we believe. And that surfaces as feeling like a fraud. It becomes the dominant story in your mind.
When we have imposter syndrome, we seek to have approval from others more than we seek the approval inside of ourselves, and the circumstance becomes the lie we cringe from.
Break The Pattern
Imposter syndrome is not about you not feeling good enough to do the job. The truth is, imposter syndrome is not being able to separate our own self worth from our need for validation for our work.
The truth is, it has nothing to do with not being good enough. And it has nothing to do with other people’s perceptions of us or fear of being found out. It has to do with our OWN internal fears and negative subconscious programming.
We are born human - with amazing gifts, many flaws, and many things to learn. But anything in life can be learned. And when we admit to ourselves our own weaknesses and flaws and accept them with curiosity and positivity, then we can break the pattern of negative thinking and melt imposter syndrome, turning it into a lesson of life long learning and freeing our minds from constant self criticism to constant growth.
It’s A Simple Practice
Now that you know what imposter syndrome really is, when you are in a work situation and you start doubting your accomplishments and feeling like a fraud, how do you break the pattern - for good?
The first step is to acknowledge that the programmed way of thinking that started when you were a child is just a pattern. To break the cycle you need to raise your self worth.
It starts by realizing you have a choice. Instead of judgement, approach it with curiosity, freedom, growth, and the empowerment of knowing you have a choice. A choice to live the life you want and having the courage to step into alignment with your capable and worthy self.
You can do this at home with a simple morning and nighttime ritual.
First, define your goal. How do you define your self worth?
What are the 3 things you going to see in your life when you have your self worth?
What are people going to be saying to you and about you when it’s true?
What are you going to be saying to yourself?
How are you going to feel?
Repeat your goal to yourself everyday right after you wake up and right before you go to sleep. Visualize what you will see and feel what you will feel. Eventually, you will teach your brain to think about your self worth from your own judgements and not from outside circumstances. You break the pattern by changing the beliefs about yourself. And when you change your beliefs, your thoughts change. You start being more relaxed and you show up just as yourself, flaws and all. And eventually your self worth and personal value starts to raise.
When your perception shifts, everything changes.
The truth is, you are always going to be growing in your career and life and having a human brain, you are going to encounter not feeling good enough throughout your life because you’re always moving forward and getting better. That is not a negative thing - as long as you recognize it for what it is and know how to change it.
It’s just information.
Self worth - how you value yourself - is and should be about your own beliefs about yourself and emotional states without outside circumstances.
Getting rid of imposter syndrome and owning your self worth is not a destination or an overnight occurrence. It’s the pursuit of a life worth living. Now that you know, you can adjust accordingly, reel the emotion back in and make better choices so you have balance in your brain. No stress. No anger.
Are you ready to be free from the lie of imposter syndrome? Be curious to ask that question and be ready to receive the path to create it.
BE RICH NOW BREAKTHROUGH SESSION
If you are ready to massively scale your cash flow, growth, and impact by reprogramming your money code, learning and implementing proven wealth management strategies, then, schedule a complimentary Be Rich Now Breakthrough session here.
During our time together, we will:
get clarity about your current financial situation
uncover the top 3 money beliefs behind why you’re really struggling to live your rich life
design a blueprint for you to get rich
If I’m 100% sure I can help you, we’ll talk about what working together would look like. If it's not a good fit, I'll point you to people and resources who can help you.
Hi! I’m Angela Anderson.
I help entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and practitioners rapidly scale beyond 6 figures, massively scale their cash flow, explode their growth … and have the freedom & abundance to live the life they adore. With over 20 years in personal development and entrepreneurship in the areas of subconscious mind reprogramming, health & fitness, and business, I can show you how real change happens in your mind.
As a PSYCH-K® Facilitator and former employee at the PSYCH-K® Centre International, a leader in subconscious reprogramming, I can show you how to leverage proven neuroscience. Using mind management tools I will guide you to unlock and transform the vault of you self-limiting, self-sabotaging and negative beliefs about money.
When I'm not working with clients from all over the world through the power of the internet, I'm living the good life with my husband and two boys in Colorado, nestled at the base of Sangre de Cristo mountains and overlooking the Sand Dunes National Park & Preserve ... and world traveling.
If you also totally get how important it is to take care of your mind, body, and spirit while giving your all to your business, family and more - you're going to love this work.